Hello my 10 loyal followers, I forgot to share some big news from two weeks ago or so. Now those of you who know me know that I am a tough guy. I'm rough, I'm rugged and I've got serious swagger. I'm just going to cut to the chase -- I was jumped last week in Santa Cruz and got into a fight. I was minding my own business, investigating the beach, checking out food on beach blankets when out of nowhere I was sucker jumped from behind by a massive boxer. I don't know if I was wearing the wrong colors (I have a new blue color) or maybe it was a classic jealously situation but this boxer tried to kill me. He went straight for my throat and tried to throw me to the ground but I wouldn't have it! I did a completely 360 backflip, effectively removing myself from his reach. With a ferocious growl he launched at me again and again! I evaded his reach while simultaneously (and quite aggressively) ripping into his haunches. Ohhh the savagery. At that moment I really felt keyed in with my ancestors - the wolves that is. Now, obviously I was completely taking care of myself and I would have had him if my dad hadn't intervened. Fatherly instinct I suppose. But anyway, just as I went for my kill move dad stepped in with his huge hands and used his enormous feet to separate the fight and effectively sever any ties to manliness that remained after my mother had me sterilized.
**Editorial notes - Instead of the authors usual photo, he's included a video to demonstrate his ferocity. Additionally, the author has embellished aspects of this true story to enhance his appearance of bravery**
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